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Real Fakes

A couple of months ago I posted about the wide range of absurd items that are being "faked" these days (like elevators and Buick Engine Blocks).

Here is a kinda cool update.  A Dutch design boutique have decided that instead of trying pass that knock-off for the real thing, it's time for us to  embrace the truth.

Mind What You Wear calls a fake a fake with this new series of fake stuff.  Founder Bea Correa's perspective is interesting:

"Despite all efforts to eradicate counterfeits goods, we receive thousands of e-mails every day advertising anything from luxury label replicas to phony life-saving medicines. Every city has a crowded black market. And ‘Fake’ is not merely limited to b-grade products: how many times have you seen a beautiful woman and wondered which parts were authentic? 'Fake’ has become one of the defining keywords of the current age, and Mind What You Wear is embracing the trend."

They sure are, their range includes fake Louis Vuitton bags with the word "FAKE" silkscreened on the side in huge letters....

Just the thing for people who are anti-everything...

Where are all the Australian Entrepreneurs?

An excellent question is posed by Stephen Mayne in the weeks Reader, about why Australian has so few successful young companies:

"Australia is a relatively young country, so why is it that so many of our biggest and best companies are so old?  A quick look at the top 20 Australian public companies reveals lots of old incumbent players like Coles Myer, the Big Four Banks, Telstra, BHP, AMP and Foster's- all of which have been around for decades- and hardly any new ones."

That is a very true observation; Australia doesn't have any new corporate champions coming through. 

I reckon that we (Australians, our Governments and other regulators) have made it too hard for all of our budding entrepreneurs to shake off the bad smell left behind by the rouges of the 1980's like Alan Bond, Christopher Skase and Jack Elliott.    We don't like corporate risk takers in this country any more.  We are adverse to risk, and don't have a culture that readily accepts that failure is all part of the game, part of trying, part of learning.

And of course we have turned chopping down "tall poppies" into a national sport.  A sport at which we (shamefully) excel.

In the US if you go broke having "a go" you don't seem to cope the same level of condemnation as you do here in Australia.  They have a far greater tolerance for things like bankruptcy and business failure.So is it any wonder that the US has produced billionaires from booming companies like Yahoo, Google, Dell and eBay.  And we have... well, not much.  Except for a few infrastructure companies with Government contracts, Child Care centres that rely on Government subsidies and airlines and telco's that make bucks because they operate in cosy little duopolies.

Add to that the barriers for entry into many of our growth areas are too high, and the level of Government support and encouragement for our genuinely innovative risk takers and innovators is too low. 

You are better off just getting a nice, secure job with one of the big, old, unoriginal companies.

ANZAC Day

"They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old;
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We will remember them."

As an Australian I often get asked "What is ANZAC DAY?"  This from The Australian War Memorial offers a nice summary:

ANZAC Day - 25 April - is probably Australia's most important national occasion. It marks the anniversary of the first major military action fought by Australian and New Zealand forces during the First World War. ANZAC stands for Australian and New Zealand Army Corps. The soldiers in those forces quickly became known as ANZACs, and the pride they soon took in that name endures to this day.
Why is this day so special to Australians?
When war broke out in 1914 Australia had been a federal commonwealth for only fourteen years. The new national government was eager to establish its reputation among the nations of the world. In 1915 Australian and New Zealand soldiers formed part of the allied expedition that set out to capture the Gallipoli peninsula to open the way to the Black Sea for the allied navies. The plan was to capture Constantinople (now Istanbul), capital of the Ottoman Empire and an ally of Germany. They landed at Gallipoli on 25 April, meeting fierce resistance from the Turkish defenders. What had been planned as a bold stroke to knock Turkey out of the war quickly became a stalemate, and the campaign dragged on for eight months. At the end of 1915 the allied forces were evacuated after both sides had suffered heavy casualties and endured great hardships. Over 8,000 Australian soldiers were killed. News of the landing at Gallipoli made a profound impact on Australians at home and 25 April quickly became the day on which Australians remembered the sacrifice of those who had died in war.
Though the Gallipoli campaign failed in its military objectives of capturing Constantinople and knocking Turkey out of the war, the Australian and New Zealand troops' actions during the campaign bequeathed an intangible but powerful legacy. The creation of what became known as an "Anzac legend" became an important part of the national identity of both nations. This shaped the ways they viewed both their past and their future.

(UPDATE:  Andrew Leight has published an article on why young Australians have helped to spark renewed enthusiasm for Anzac Day, check it out here)

Kyrptonite- Still battling against Bic Pens

Remember the Kryptonite bike lock people and the saga with the Bic pen?

Johnnie Moore points to this update at Community Guy here.

Parliamentary Boofheads: Our Taxes at Work

With so many important social issues about at the moment, it's comforting to know that our politicians are engaging in constructive debates during Parliament sessions:

This from Meredith Burgmann, president of the Legislative Council of NSW:

"On 6 April 2005 I was asked to rule whether the term "boofhead" should be ruled out of order. I am generally in favour of the tradition of robust debate in this Chamber and believe that members of the House should not be too precious about their public lives. Having examined a precedent and considered the issue deeply, I find that the term "boofhead" has been used in past debates in this Chamber. Having regard to the rulings of previous Presidents, I rule that the term "boofhead" may be considered unparliamentary only if the member so addressed finds the term offensive.

I am informed that the Hon. Ian Macdonald does not regard the term as offensive. Accordingly, I rule that the term "boofhead" is not unparliamentary. However, I warn members that I have discovered that the following terms are unparliamentary and, therefore, out of order: scabs and rats, treacherous turncoat, thug boy, nong, and duplicitous Labor lap dog, which I rule to be out of order."

(thanks to Andrew at IA.  You can now get his book on Amazon)

The Great Oral-B Sampling Campaign

I pick up the Herald Sun each morning on my way to work.  I toss the Indian bloke in the 7-11 a dollar coin and off I go.  But this morning he made me stop and gave me 50c back....He uttered something about a mini-tooth wiper thingy being inside. 

Hmm.  Apparently, Gillette, which is in the process of merging with Proctor & Gamble to create the world's biggest consumer products company, came up with the idea of spending several million dollars on Australia's biggest ever single day sampling exercise by funding a halving of the cover price of papers including the Herald Sun, The Daily Telegraph, The Courier-Mail and The Advertiser.  That gives them a reach of more than 2 million people, who all got a sample an Oral B mini tooth wiper.

As Stephen Mayne at Crikey said today, "I never imagined buying a dead tree splattered with filthy ink and then taking something out of it and cleaning my teeth, but it happened this morning."  Sure did.

They are an innovative lot over at Gillette.

When they launched Mach 3 in Sydney, everyone who went through the Sydney Harbour Bridge toll for a day was paid for by Gillette, resulting in a stack of press coverage. More recently they painted a Virgin jet to look like a razor to promote the launch of a new power shaver.

Why do this?  It is a fact that internet and viral marketing is on the rise as television and newspapers decline, prompting the marketeer to try more and more crazy concepts to stay in the game with the big-spending global consumer giants.

A Wake on Wheels

Remember Seth's little gem from last last week:

"Figure what the always is. Then do something else"

OK, let's apply that to a funeral: 

Once the church ceremony is completed, the mourners follow a hearse from the chapel to the cemetery in their cars. Because it is impossible for the whole family to ride in the hearse, and to have one last trip with their loved one, they too, jump into the motorcade.  And off they all go,  lights ablaze, four  mourners per car.  Then they all file out to attend the graveside service, and jump back in their cars, and off to the wake.

That is what always happens.  So an enterprising Australian funeral house (Tobin Brothers) has decided to do something different.

They have built a family funeral bus.

It will cater for up to a dozen mourners, who will be able to pile into the bus, fire up the DVD player, crack open the mini-bar, or have coffee and biscuits as they travel to the cemetery in style.

The bus' interior took four months to transform and features soft lighting, chrome handrails, tinted windows, pop-out cup holders and plush upholstery with leathers seats for the mourners.  They will be able to choose everything from what is stocked in the bar fridge, which DVD is screened to what is heated in the Microwave (no cremation jokes please) and whether the tinted screen between to family and the coffin is up or down.

They spent A$200 000 on the bus, and hope that it will help them keep up with the trend towards choice and more personalised funeral services.

Different.  Innovative.  Unique.

Well done.

Did the Greens influence the Papal Vote?

Unless you live in another Galaxy, you'll know that we now have a new Pope.  Probably not a new, more liberal Catholic Church, but a new Pope all the same. In annoiting Ratzinger, the vatican has voted for some continuity of John Paul's policies.  This signals an endorsement of the church's most conservative teachings and views.  Couple his views with his snow-white hair, piercing blue eyes and soft German accent (I think he looks a bit sinister), he'll be a bundle of funs that's for sure.

I wonder if those silly, irrelevent wombats over at the Australian Greens had anything to do with Ratzinger's transformation into Pope Benedict XVI? 

Following reports that George Pell, the Arch bishop of Sydney, had emerged as a dark horse to become the next Pope, Greens MP Lee Rhiannon fired off a note  to the Vatican urging the Catholic Church to deny the ultra conservative leader a promotion to head the church…

Who the hell she thinks she is has got me stuffed.  Silly old duck isn't even a Catholic.

I await the the letter from the new Pope urging the Greens to dump Lee Rhiannon...

Morons: 1 & 2

Morons #1: The 9 Australians caught smuggling drugs in Bali last night.

For the last month here in Australia our news has been dominated by the story of Shapelle Corby.  Everyone of them was filled with words like Bali, Drugs, Death Penalty and Firing Squad.

Yet these morons tried their luck anyway, strapping eight kg of Heroin to themseleves before attempting to jump on a plane home.

No doubt they'll plead thier innocence, but hopefully it will fall on deaf ears.

I have no time for drug traffickers, and Australian or not, they deserve whatever the Balinese caught decides.  There will be arguements over whether the local penatly (death) should apply, or whether they should be hauled home and locked up in a local jail.  I know there is a very real human side to all of this, but these people are scum.  Stupid, dumb scum.  They deserve what is coming to them.

Morons #2:  South Melbourne & Preston Soccer Fans

A Sunday night soccer game between South Melbourne, largely supported by Melbourne's Greeks, and the Preston Lions, backed almost by the Macedonian community,  become a mass riot that required Policeon Horseback to break the angry mob up.   

The disgraceful clash reflected historic enmity between the neighbouring European countries. The simmering tensions boiled over as they threw bottles and flares at each other until mounted police arrested ring leaders and, herded the anrgy mob back over fences.

So now future games are likely to be played behind closed doors in empty stadiums.  How stupid is that!  Competitive sport inside a empty, locked stadium.

These morons need to understand that here in multicultural Australia it is not the place to pursue your imported ancient grudges.

Doing the Always

This from Seth Godin:

Figure what the always is. Then do something else.

Toothpaste always comes in a squeezable tube.
Business travelers always use a travel agent.
Politicians always have their staff screen their calls.

Figure out what the always is, then do exactly the opposite. Do the never.

Nice.  Simple.  Clever.  As usual from Seth.